My cat's constipation is creating problems I can't begin to talk about. I need to change his food, I think.
On Sunday I was driving through downtown on the way home. As I approached the corner of Baltimore & Gay, where my car nearly broke down on the 4th, there was a shirtless man walking down the street in my lane. He was punching and kicking the air. He was clearly someplace else. I think he waived me into the other lane. I unrolled my window as I went by to see if I could hear some of his rantings. I couldn't. That disappointed me more than the fact a drugged-up crazed man was roaming the streets of Baltimore on a Sunday afternoon less than a stone's throw from the police headquarters.
The panhandling at the closest intersection near my house is operated by a crazy homeless man with a limp and a one-legged lady. Occasionally kids with church groups or football teams operate the corner. Sometimes a younger homeless guy. Erica and I imagine that they clock in and out at the gas station like Sam and Ralph from Looney Tunes.
Sidney Ponson will never ever play baseball for my fantasy team again.
I have now golfed twice in two years. I lose interest after about nine holes. If wasn't for the beer, I'm not sure how anyone would play this game. Without beer, there would be no such thing as golf or fishing.
My new favorite website is http://www.huffingtonpost.com/
Ally rolled from back to stomach to back. Very cool.
We close on our house on Friday. Move in a month. I hope not to move again for at least 10 years.
I need more life insurance.
My will is complete. You're probably not in it.
We met with a financial advisor. She advised that we need to save an ungodly amount of money. We have a better shot of winning the lottery than meeting her goals.
It's extremely hot and humid.
I cannot get my work e-mails below 50.
On Sunday I was driving through downtown on the way home. As I approached the corner of Baltimore & Gay, where my car nearly broke down on the 4th, there was a shirtless man walking down the street in my lane. He was punching and kicking the air. He was clearly someplace else. I think he waived me into the other lane. I unrolled my window as I went by to see if I could hear some of his rantings. I couldn't. That disappointed me more than the fact a drugged-up crazed man was roaming the streets of Baltimore on a Sunday afternoon less than a stone's throw from the police headquarters.
The panhandling at the closest intersection near my house is operated by a crazy homeless man with a limp and a one-legged lady. Occasionally kids with church groups or football teams operate the corner. Sometimes a younger homeless guy. Erica and I imagine that they clock in and out at the gas station like Sam and Ralph from Looney Tunes.
Sidney Ponson will never ever play baseball for my fantasy team again.
I have now golfed twice in two years. I lose interest after about nine holes. If wasn't for the beer, I'm not sure how anyone would play this game. Without beer, there would be no such thing as golf or fishing.
My new favorite website is http://www.huffingtonpost.com/
Ally rolled from back to stomach to back. Very cool.
We close on our house on Friday. Move in a month. I hope not to move again for at least 10 years.
I need more life insurance.
My will is complete. You're probably not in it.
We met with a financial advisor. She advised that we need to save an ungodly amount of money. We have a better shot of winning the lottery than meeting her goals.
It's extremely hot and humid.
I cannot get my work e-mails below 50.
posted by DEW at 7/25/2005 10:59:00 PM
4 Comments:
Now that's a post!
I would like to congratulate DEW on becoming Mr. 3000, only slightly less entertaining than my awful movie of the same name.
You do not understand golf because Ally is more athletic than you.
Please allow me to offer some unsolicited but helpful advice to two of the issues addressed in this post.
First, cat problem: Cats are the only true and complete carnivorous animals on the face of the planet. Cats are genetically programed to eat only meat; unlike (a) humans, who subsist on meat, ripe fruit and vegetables, and starches (in multiple forms), and (b) dogs, who prefer meat but may also survive quite happily on protein derived from grains (most commercial dog food is actually 40% grain). Your cat's problem is more likely your problem. Someone is feeding Mr. Cat with food meant for Mr. and Mrs. Human or Mr. or Mrs. Human is feeding Mr. Cat with left-over dog food from Mr. Al (due respects as I knew him well).
Financial Planning/Retirement Savings Problem: Don't throw that left-over dog food out, just don't feed it to the cat. You're going to need it for yourself someday.
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